When Public Art Goes Bad

Every morning, as I bike through the center of Den Haag on my way to work, I think to myself: "WTF?!?"

Straight from Castle Grayskull

Before I go any further, I should clarify that I really like public art. I think it's important.  I think it's cool.  I come, after all, from a city where the (then-future) mayor famously exposed himself to it. Yay public art.

But The Hague has some seriously bad public art.  In fact, it's so bad that I've grown oddly attached to some of it.  I've posted some of my "favorites" after the jump.

As you'll see, Jeff has aptly named two of them (be forewarned, juvenile bathroom humor ensues).  But the other two (and the homage to Skeletor on the right) still lack names - suggestions are always welcome.

First, the most aesthetically unappealing of the lot, which Jeff calls 69 on the Plein:

("Plein," for the non-Dutch speakers, means "plaza" and rhymes with "line.")

And, my personal favorite (because it's right next to the Dutch Parliament), Reclining Yellow Dildo:

Then there's the cartoon duck alien with pointy boobs and a car that is evidently powered by purple fart juice:

Kids appear especially drawn to the fart-mobile.  Maybe it's the bright colors.  They seem less interested in the friendly stack of Smurf butts, complete with anatomically correct holes - perhaps because it's unclear what happened to the Smurf heads:

In conclusion, I have to give The Hague credit for trying: there's at least two dozen statues within a five-block stretch.  It's just unfortunate that almost all of them are laughably bad.  But at least they're not forgettable.