Portland or Den Haag?

In recent months, Jeff has made no secret of his growing love affair with The Hague - a sentiment, it should be noted, that is so unusual amongst the expat set that it draws suspicion bordering on outright hostility.  This state of affairs has led me to adopt a line of argument that can be roughly paraphrased as "Portland-is-just-like-The-Hague-only-not-in-Europe."

There is actually quite a bit of truth to this argument.  Both are gray-weather cities full of white people who like to think they are more liberal than they actually are, where bicyclists have privileged status and pot smoking is (more or less) tolerated.  In the spirit of my Dutch vs. Danish musings (albeit without the fun alliteration), I present Round 2: Portland or Den Haag?

Dutch Minivan

Bicycle lanes: Portland might be the bike-friendliest city in the US, but that's a pretty low bar.  How we will miss the protected bike lanes, bike-specific stoplights, and Dutch drivers' extreme consideration for unmotorized traffic.  Point: DH.

Beer: Yes, Belgian beer is more readily available on tap in The Hague (see, e.g., De Paas).  But Belgian beer is also increasingly available in beer-conscious Portland, and Portland has a fabulous array of locally brewed alternatives.  Just wait until I introduce Jeff to Bailey's Taproom.  Point: PDX.

Asian food: There's only 1 Vietnamese restaurant in town here, and it cost me over 20 euros for dinner. Point: PDX.

My #17 Tram

Public transit:  With whom am I more annoyed, Portland's Trimet for nixing Fareless Square, or the Dutch for replacing strippenkaart with the frickin' OV chipkaart?  Point: DH, begrudgingly. 

Street food: I finally found a purveyor of raw herring that I actually like (Simonis). And fresh, hot stroopwaffel can change your life.  But the explosion of food carts in Portland over the last 10 years provides so much variety that The Hague's narrow range of fish, fries, and sweets just can't compete.  Point: PDX.

Grote Markt vs. Pioneer Courthouse Square: Portland's "living room" is a multipurpose space with a Starbucks, food carts, fountain, chess boards, information office, and almost-daily concerts or events.  The Hague's is a confluence of cafe tables, perfect for a beer on a sunny day but largely dead for six months out of the year.  Also, every other Dutch (and Flemish) town has a "Grote Markt."  At least Portland got creative with the naming.  Point: PDX.

Grote Markt on Queen's Night

Japanese gardens: I'm including this category only because I was so disappointed in The Hague's much-hyped garden (tiny, and only open two months of the year). It simply does not compare to Portland's 5.5 acres of exquisitely maintained Japanese Gardens. Point: PDX.

Outdoor Markets: Portland's farmers markets are too prone to yuppification or crunchy granola-ness.  The Saturday Market, full of stuff you don't need, is only open on weekends and closes for three months in winter.  Portland's going down on this one.  Sure, the Hague's massive Turkish Market includes rows of stalls purveying assorted dollar store-type crap.  But it also has an amazing selection of high-quality produce, fish, and meat stands.  It's like a mini-United Nations, with Lebanese bread, Turkish sweets, and fruits and vegetables we don't even recognize.  Plus it's cheap: Jeff's recent finds include three pineapples for €1. Best of all, the Turkish Market is open four days a week and year-round.  Point: DH.

I could continue, but you get the general point.  If we give up The Hague for Portland, life will be about the same, except with more hills and Asian food.  Yes, we will miss the world-class museums, the canals, and Jeff's beloved Turkish Market.  But in exchange we would get decent coffee, freedom from the vagaries of the exchange rate, and restaurants we actually enjoy patronizing.  That seems like a fair trade to me - let's hope Jeff agrees.